I’m grateful to be home from our little vacation to California.
We had a great time, but it’s nice to be back and start things off. I hope that my study and writing will be helpful for me today as I think about where I am in recovery and progress.
Becky and I are considering writing a book about our experience in addiction and recovery. Honestly, this is exciting and scary all at the same time.
Do I really have the time?
Do I have a good voice?
Will I be able to share stuff that will help others in their path of recovery?
I think I do have a good voice and can do it, time is the big question.
But I’m committed to recovery, and if writing a book is part of that process, I’m in.
If I were to compile a list of some of my best, most helpful writing, it would look like this:
- My Apology Letter to My Recovering Wife – 7.21.14
- 12 Things I’ve Learned and Am Doing Different in My Addiction Recovery Process This Time – 6.30.14
- 5 Things I’ve Learned from ArpSupport.org Program – 3.16.15
- 5 Tools that have helped me in Addiction Recovery – 3.17.15
- What Does it Mean to Submit My Will to God? – 3.24.15
- The 10 Most Important Things I’ve Learned About Recovery From Addiction – 5.10.15
- Parental Boundaries – 6.13.15
- How to Create Parent Boundaries – 4.22.15
- 3 Tips for New Sponsees – 8.30.15
- What I’m Learning About Sponsorship – 9.14.15
- The Blessing of Sponsorship – 9.9.15
- What I’m Learning as a Sponsor – 8.27.15
- Burying My Weapons of War – 3.29.14
- Love You, Hate the Porn Book Helps – 4.30.14
- The Ups and Downs of My Bad Choices – 6.20.14
- How to Control Lustful Tendencies – 6.24.14
- The Worst Feeling of My Life – 6.29.14
- Why War Chapters in the Book of Mormon? – 8.20.14
- Recovery vs. Sobriety – is there a difference? – 9.3.14
- My Letter to the Addict – 10.22.14
- What Would My Perfect Day Look Like? – 1.26.15
- How to Stay in Recovery After Step Work is Complete? – 4.2.15
This stuck out in one post I read:
One of the biggest changes I’ve made so far that has influenced my life drastically is the elimination of social media from my life. Leaving Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and other social networks has been a blessing in so many ways:
- I’m so much more productive with work.
- I no longer waste hours at a time browsing the internet.
- Lust has all but disappeared.
- My desires to do what’s right have increased.
- I feel better about how I’m using my time and have less shame and self-pity.
With this change, it’s made abstaining from pornography much easier too.
Am I out of the woods? No. But I feel good about “burying this weapon of war” that, in the past, was a huge justification and ultimately led me down a path I never thought I’d go.
What other changes have I made?
- Go to bed earlier
- Don’t stay up after Becky goes to bed
- Work the sponsorship program
- Become a sponsor
- Minimal watching of TV
- Minimal listening to the radio
- Adding Covenant Eyes to our computers
- Daily talks with Becky about the AEIOUs
- Reading scriptures with Becky at night
- Praying in the moment of temptation, especially regarding lustful thoughts
- Keeping my chin up – not looking at women from the chin down – and praying for help with this
- Attending recovery meetings consistently
- Keeping track of my recovery date and being accountable
- Talking to my parents about the problem
- Trying each day to submit my will to God and let Him direct me for good
So, that has been my study today.
I read over a lot of the writing I compiled. I feel like there is so much I’ve written, and maybe some that I need to write more about.
If I could break down how the book would go for me, it would look something like this:
- How did this start?
- What was my addiction path?
- What did addiction do for me?
- If I knew then what I know now, what would I do differently?
- Talking about the elephant in the room
- What is addiction?
- Why social media is Satan’s subtle tool for addicts
- Lust: Satan’s worldly way to our heart
- What is rock bottom and why do I need to hit it?
- Why my wife needs recovery work too
- The best tools for pornography addiction recovery
- Sponsorship and Being a Sponsee
- Being all in in addiction recovery
- Minimizing, Rationalizing, Justifying and Shame
- I’m in recovery from addiction, now what?
I will continue to think about this process and look forward to the next steps.