“If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us” (1 John 1:8)
How can step 4 help you accomplish such a task?
I think going back, retrieving painful and embarrassing memories, and putting them in writing has helped me recognize that I am ill. I truly suffer from addiction. That is the truth. I could think I am doing really well and that “I am cured,” but looking back at times when I thought the same think and a few days latter relapsed, helps me see that those feelings are simply a condition within the illness. Step 4, keeping an inventory, helps me keep a better perspective of my recovery.
I am recovering pornography addict. I am not ashamed of it (should the diabetic feel ashamed of her disease?) because that is the truth; that is my condition. Bad decisions in my youth compromised my agency. Today I seek to repent and break free of this illness. I am not a bad person getting “good”, but an ill person getting better. I seek the power of heaven to heal me for I cannot do this by my own means. I seek daily and continuous revelation to know God’s will. I surrender my will–for my will inevitably sooner or later leads me to addiction–to God and seek to obey God’s will. I trust that whatever he commands me to do will bring, in the long run, peace, freedom, joy, and virtue. I strive to stay humble and submissive to God for that is true discipleship. I pray for these two attributes.
Let’s have a good day everybody.
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