One of the top visited articles on this site is titled, “Applying ‘On Being Genuine’ to My Life.”
I went back and read what I wrote in that journal entry and want to dig into it deeper today.
The purpose of doing my dailies should be that I’m making efforts to connect with God and understand how His Son is and how I can be more like Him.
Efforts to connect with God.
Efforts to understand how His Sone is.
Efforts to understand how I can be more like Him.
Are these the reasons why I’m trying to do my dailies?
How can I manifest this?
As I think about my day yesterday and do an inventory, I would say, overall the day went pretty well. I did lose my patience with Jayden and the girls a bit at dinner time because I felt they weren’t moving as fast as I’d have liked them to.
I felt a bit of past emotions, almost expectations, to be close to Becky, and I seemed to be more clingy. I had attempted to connect with God that morning through study and writing, but I’m not sure how connected I really felt.
Am I being too hard on myself?
Is this the super-ego playing a role in my mindset?
I think one of my feelings yesterday was overwhelmed, anxiety for all the things I have on my plate, and not really knowing where to start, what to do, or how to best prioritize.
One of the best things that happened yesterday to calm my anxiety was having a talk with Beck near the end of the day. We talked about the business organizational chart, roles, what holes I have in the business, where I would like to be next year at this time, and the next steps I can take.
I always want to be careful not to look too far ahead – this can add to the anxiety and fear. But it’s good to do some planning and know where I want to go, then assess how I plan to get there.
I felt good, as well, to start the meeting with a prayer to ask God to help direct us; I feel he really did. Becky is so thoughtful and can connect the dots and see a different perspective than me. This really helps.
It’s still overwhelming as I think about all the things that have to be done, but I am trying to surrender that fear to God today and take things one moment at a time.
What I plan to do today
- Pray, study, write
- Work on discovery call prep
- Discovery call
- Work on recurring projects
- Get information to Vision
I’ll start with those five things that I believe I can handle; then I’ll move on from there.
The Savior was understanding and compassionate with sinners whose hearts were humble and sincere. But He rose up in righteous anger against hypocrites like the scribes, Pharisees, and Sadducees—those who tried to appear righteous in order to win the praise, influence, and wealth of the world, all the while oppressing the people they should have been blessing. The Savior compared them to “whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness.”
How can I be humble and sincere?
Words that come to mind: GRATEFUL, THOUGHTFUL, always asking God for help to be sincere, PONDER, PRAY, SURRENDER, SERVICE. I believe these are true things I can ask for help with, and God will extend His hand to help me.
Christ already has extended His hand to help me. He’s already paid the price for these feelings. I just need to reach out to Him, surrender my feelings, and trust in Him.
I don’t want to “appear righteous in order to win the praise, influence, and wealth of the world…”
What is the condition of my heart today? What am I doing to have a pure heart and clean hands today? Am I willing to submit my heart and my will over to Him and let Him direct me?
My heart condition today is that I have desires to do what is right.
My heart condition today is that I want to live in recovery.
My heart condition today is that I want to take things a moment at a time and trust that He will help me.
I want to be grateful, so grateful, that I’m still in the best relationship of my life with my truest friend.
I want to be so grateful for my sweet children: for their health, strength, good minds, desires to do what’s right, and that they still love me despite my impatience with them and my weaknesses.
I am willing to submit my heart and my will over to Him and let Him direct me right now. I realize this is a moment to moment decision and one I have to be aware of all the time.
I want to keep my weapons of war buried today.
[Christ] would want to know how we love and minister to those in our care, how we show our love to our spouse and family, and how we lighten their daily load.
I feel I’m doing this today. And I want to do this today.
…the Savior would want to know how you and I grow closer to Him and to our Heavenly Father.
I’m trying to grow closer to both of them by studying, reading, and writing out my thoughts. I’m also trying to pray, although I feel I can be more prayerful during the day as I have thoughts and feelings come to my mind and heart. This needs to be my first response to those thoughts and feelings.
This is an awesome quote too:
…as we serve in our families, quorums, wards, stakes, communities, and nations, we will resist the temptation to draw attention to ourselves and, instead, strive for a far greater honor: to become humble, genuine disciples of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. As we do so, we will find ourselves walking the path that leads to our best, most genuine, and noblest selves.
I’m grateful to have the desires to do what’s right today.
I’m grateful to want to be genuine and sincere today.
I look forward to living in recovery.