Today is a new day. I’m so glad Becky is back and that we can work together to help our kids.
Tomorrow I meet with Gordon. I’m glad that I got the Control Assignments done. One other assignment I want to work on is the “Creating Your Future Picture Statement”.
I’ll work on that today, but first I wanted to read more about How to Teach Your Children About Pornography.
Here are some scriptures this section of the lesson shares:
Galatians 5:22-23 – how does it feel to have the Spirit in our home?
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith,
23 Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law.
Alma 48:7-9 – what was Captain Moroni doing to fortify his family against his enemies?
7 Now it came to pass that while Amalickiah had thus been obtaining power by fraud and deceit, Moroni, on the other hand, had been preparing the minds of the people to be faithful unto the Lord their God.
8 Yea, he had been strengthening the armies of the Nephites, and erecting small forts, or places of resort; throwing up banks of earth round about to enclose his armies, and also building walls of stone to encircle them about, round about their cities and the borders of their lands; yea, all round about the land.
9 And in their weakest fortifications he did place the greater number of men; and thus he did fortify and strengthen the land which was possessed by the Nephites.
Moroni 7:16-17 – how to discern between what the Spirit feels like and what the power of Satan feels like.
16 For behold, the Spirit of Christ is given to every man, that he may know good from evil; wherefore, I show unto you the way to judge; for every thing which inviteth to do good, and to persuade to believe in Christ, is sent forth by the power and gift of Christ; wherefore ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of God.
17 But whatsoever thing persuadeth men to do evil, and believe not in Christ, and deny him, and serve not God, then ye may know with a perfect knowledge it is of the devil; for after this manner doth the devil work, for he persuadeth no man to do good, no, not one; neither do his angels; neither do they who subject themselves unto him.
There is so much good content on LDS.org about how to help “fortify our homes” against pornography and the power of the destroyer.
I am excited to start working with a sponsor. I think I feel a bit anxious about where I am right now in recovery: things have been going so well, I’ve been trying to submit my will to God each day, and I feel good about the direction I’m facing. But I don’t want to get complacent or lazy or over-confident. I want to be humble and prayerful.
I’ve been studying but I sometimes wonder if what I’m studying is enough.
I feel this is part of my super-ego that sets unrealistic expectations on myself and then I begin to self-doubt and tell myself I’m not doing enough. Then I am tempted to just give up or give in. I feel good about writing this stuff out. It’s feelings or emotions I’d never recognized before. And recognizing, or being aware, is a big part of recovery and submission to God’s will.
One of the topics I want to study before I finish today is Fortifying or Preparing. Captain Moroni was a master at this – he was so prepared for his enemies that many times, it caught them completely off guard.
8 But behold, to their uttermost astonishment, they were prepared for them, in a manner which never had been known among the children of Lehi. Now they were prepared for the Lamanites, to battle after the manner of the instructions of Moroni. (Alma 49:8)
The Nephites were prepared to fight the Lamanites “after the manner of the instructions of Moroni.” How does this apply to me and to my family?
The things I’ve read today are “preparations for war” against Satan and how he uses the media against us. Reading them is helping me be aware of what I can do; it’s also helping me think about what I can teach my kids so they’re prepared. By teaching these principles, they will be prepared “in a manner which never had been known.” They will be able to fight against the powers of Satan.
This also makes me think about Step 12 and how one of the ways I can stay in recovery is by teaching and helping others (namely, my own kids).
When I cross-referenced “forts” in Alma 48:7-9 I found this scripture:
2 And behold, the city had been rebuilt, and Moroni had stationed an army by the borders of the city, and they had cast up dirt round about to shield them from the arrows and the stones of the Lamanites; for behold, they fought with stones and with arrows.
What could “casting up dirt round about to shield from the arrows and the stones” mean in my life?
What are the stones and arrows of our time?
3 Behold, I said that the city of Ammonihah had been rebuilt. I say unto you, yea, that it was in part rebuilt; and because the Lamanites had destroyed it once because of the iniquity of the people, they supposed that it would again become an easy prey for them.
Satan knows my weaknesses; he knows where the weak spots in my “city” have been in the past. But I’ve done things different this time: I’ve been “rebuilt” in order to fortify those weak areas and make them strong. I won’t be “an easy prey”
4 But behold, how great was their disappointment; for behold, the Nephites had dug up a ridge of earth round about them, which was so high that the Lamanites could not cast their stones and their arrows at them that they might take effect, neither could they come upon them save it was by their place of entrance.
I like this verse: “…how great was their disappointment”
What could the “ridge of earth round about” be in my life?
5 Now at this time the chief captains of the Lamanites were astonished exceedingly, because of the wisdom of the Nephites in preparing their places of security.
How am I “preparing [my] places of security?”
6 Now the leaders of the Lamanites had supposed, because of the greatness of their numbers, yea, they supposed that they should be privileged to come upon them as they had hitherto done; yea, and they had also prepared themselves with shields, and with breastplates; and they had also prepared themselves with garments of skins, yea, very thick garments to cover their nakedness.
This reminds me of the “row-boat fighting a battleship” analogy. There’s no way I can fight this on my own. But instead, I’m fortifying through study, and prayer, and going to meetings, and getting a dedicated sponsor, and talking with Becky, and being 100% honest with myself and others.
The scripture goes on from verses 7-13 and 18-24. I’ll study more about this tomorrow.
Today has started off well. I’m grateful for this study. I’m grateful to be here today. I’m grateful to have the desires to submit my will to God. I look forward to working the steps of recovery and becoming trained to be an effective sponsor for others.
I’m grateful that Becky still loves me.
I’m grateful for the power of the Atonement which is helping me recover from addiction.
I’m grateful that Heavenly Father is there and wants to bless me as I’m worthy.
I’m hopeful that today will be another day in recovery as I submit my will to Him.
Hasta manana!
Nate
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