Today’s been a good day. I got my step work done pretty early in the morning, did some additional study, and then some work and then went to my wife’s ultrasound to find out that we’re still having a boy and he’s getting big, almost up to 5 pounds.
My mother-in-law has been here since last Thursday, and both Becky and I feel that it’s kind of hard to have family around as part of my recovery. It feels really busy all the time, and we don’t have time to just relax and study or rest; often times I feel like both of us revert back to old tendencies that can be dangerous, at least in my addiction recovery.
I feel I’ve been okay but don’t feel very emotionally connected to Becky because she’s so busy trying to entertain her mom.
The hardest part for me has been dealing with her little sister Mandy who has been around more. Mandy is the one that left the church due to an ex-boyfriend who introduced her to a lot of anti-Mormon literature which caused her to question all of her beliefs and ultimately leave the church. My post mission tendencies kick in and I just get frustrated when I even hear her talk about church stuff. I realize this is my pride and I know I need to work on this, but it’s definitely been a challenge that I’m aware of.
I’m happy to have her mom around and feel grateful that she still accepts me as her son in law. Really, I never feel any resentment or blame or shame from her at all, which is a huge blessing after what I’ve caused her daughter to go through.
I also got to meet with my business mentor Stan. He’s been a great asset in my business planning, goal setting, and direction in growing the business. I look forward to 2015.
This evening we went and got an official live Christmas tree, out first since caleb was a baby. We found what looks like a good one and got it all set up with some help from our neighbor.
Right now I’m standing in line at the return line at Walmart waiting to exchange Christmas lights for our tree.
Today I’m grateful for recovery.
I haven’t had to do too much as far as submission for lust since I haven’t been in tough areas. I did say a prayer when I came in to Walmart.
I’m grateful that things seem to be going good with the baby. He seems healthy and strong and is growing good so far.
I’m grateful the kids seemed to be so cooperative and getting along tonight.
I’m grateful that I got to meet with Stan today. I’m grateful for his advise and direction.
I’m grateful for the chance I had to study about humility today. I’m grateful that I have desires to be more humble.
I’m grateful to be willing to submit my life and will over to God today.
I’m grateful that today I chose to take things one moment at a time.
I’m grateful for my wife and family.
Hasta mañana!
Nate
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